No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
