we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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