did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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