Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Randomize