i jhust puked up my retainher.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
