I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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