It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
