i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize