Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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