Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
