she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
