Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Can I color on your dick again?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
