i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
