Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
