Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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