He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
