I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
