great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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