have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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