Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
