how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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