Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i was born a porn star she said
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
