And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
