she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
