Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
