my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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