come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
