I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
