I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
