Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
