Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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