I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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