yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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