that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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