I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
This can only be settled by a dance off.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
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