we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I need a burrito and a hug.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
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