sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
