Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
