So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
