Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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