no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I would fuck him just for his dog
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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