South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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