I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
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