HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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