I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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