be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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