I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
