Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
