White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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