No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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